lifestyle · Thoughts

Balancing Friendships & Relationships

Who should come first- your friends or your partner? Is it OK to drop your friends for a guy? A question as old as the chicken or the egg dilemma, and one everyone will have a different answer to- that is likely to change with time.

When I was younger, I was very much in the “hoes before bros” camp. The combination of being very tall and very shy meant I was completely dateless throughout my teenage years; while others waltzed in and out of relationships, I was always the single friend. A couple of times, my friends would get into a more serious relationship, and I felt a shift.  We’d spend less time together. They’d bring their boyfriend along to events. I got “divorced” on Facebook so my friend could put herself as “in a relationship” with her boyfriend. I got, I suppose, downgraded in their list of priorities, which hurt because they still held the same place in mine. And I mean relationships come and go, but friends are there for life, so they should come first, right?

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Thoughts

Why Is No-One Blogging About Dating Anymore?

Something has shifted in the blogosphere. It’s something I’ve been feeling for a while. But no-one has really mentioned it. Until now.

Why is no-one blogging about dating?

A few years ago, I set up an anonymous blog for a bit to document my online dating experiences, along with a random mishmash of travel and lifestyle posts. During this time, Charly Lester’s 30 Dates Blog was in full force (which was one of my favourite dating blogs OF ALL TIME for the record), along with several other big dating blogs. Then, there was a huge community of smaller dating blogs, both on WordPress and on social media. I’d have people comment on my blog, find other cool blogs to follow, and have tonnes of engaging, dating-related content to devour.

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Thoughts

Friend-Ghosting

It’s Halloween, and to celebrate, I’m writing something themed. I’ve already covered ghosting in this post (summary: don’t do it), so I thought I’d cover a variation of this sadly common occurrence: friend-ghosting. Same principle as ghosting- but you were just friends.

I’ve been a bit of a boomerang when it comes to moving out. I’m currently back home, but I’ve had stints living in London- once for four months, once for just over a year. The first time I was so busy training for my Kilimanjaro climb, fundraising, and writing I kind of neglected the social side, however the second time around I was determined to live the city-girl fantasy life. I had a couple of friends in London, so the plan was to sneak in with their crew and go from there.

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Thoughts

Dating Someone With Different Political Views

“Swipe left if you voted leave”

“Don’t message me if you voted for Trump”

“No Tories”

“No SJWs”

Political activism is on the rise. Log onto social media and it seems like everyone has an opinion. Scan through people’s dating app bios and it appears when it comes to finding a match, those opinions matter. But should they?

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Thoughts

Why You Should Be Picky

A week ago, I was shopping on ASOS. My profile pictures are looking a little tired, so to liven things up I was planning on doing a photoshoot with my photographer friend. I needed a new dress or skirt and top combo that would reflect my “brand”, as it were. Something pretty. Not to smart, not too casual. Feminine, fairly modest but still sexy. Modern traditional. I couldn’t seem to find anything that seemed right. Eventually I settled on one little number, but I just wasn’t sure. I wasn’t that enthusiastic. So I left it.

Later on, I took at look at the River Island website, and saw this gorgeous 1950s style tea dress. In 5 DIFFERENT COLOURS. So I bought my favourite, stuck the others on my Christmas list, and was so happy I didn’t buy the other one.

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Thoughts

Hindsight & Life Lessons

Sometimes I get frustrated with my lack of progress in dating. I’ve been on the apps for a good few years now but it’s been a fruitless endeavor. Sometimes I worry that I’m going to get older and it’s just going to get harder and harder.

But as I was reading through a post on The Rules Revisited yesterday, I realised that age and dating mishaps bring one advantage: experience. With experience comes lessons learned, that can help you in your dating life moving forward.

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Thoughts

No Ghosting: Why Bad Behaviour In Dating Is Not OK

Things were looking promising for fellow dating blogger Anna Hopeful. She’d been on three good dates with a guy, all pretty close together, and they were in the process of arranging a fourth. Until all of a sudden, he blocked her on WhatsApp and unmatched her on the app they met on with no explanation.

After some discussion on Twitter, another blogger decided to set up an account called “Ghost Buster”, to name and shame ghosters. Pretty soon, people were sending in their ghosting stories, which were then published along with the guys’ names and pictures.

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