Lists

26 Things Learned By 26

I turned 26 this weekend. I was going to write one of those “X Things Learned By X Age” posts to make the #SundayBlogShare the day after. However, I forgot I can’t handle spirits, so on my birthday celebrations the night before, I drank a load of homemade cocktails and vodka-and-mixers during predrinks, then more vodka at the club. Was a good night, but ended up spending the next day in bed feeling like my head was about to split open, and running back and forth to the bathroom vomiting.

Sooo that’s why the post didn’t appear on Sunday. But I thought it was a cool idea, so here it is now.

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Miscellaneous

My Cervical Screening Experience

Warning: TMI. If you’re a man, related to me, or just easily offended you might want to click away. 

We’ve all got to do it. Well, all of us with a cervix have to at least. What am I talking about? Cervical screening of course. The smear test. Or “pap smear” if you’re American. That dreaded letter you get just before you turn 25.

A quick overview for those unfamiliar with the test. The cervical screening test is to detect whether there are any abnormal cells in the cervix, which if untreated could lead to cervical cancer. If the test detects abnormal cells- you can then get them removed, and- yay!- you don’t get cervical cancer! Great right? In the test itself, a plastic instrument called a speculum is inserted into the vagina to open it up so the nurse can find your cervix, then a small brush is used to take the cells. Sounds really scary but it’s not as bad as it seems, honestly!

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Thoughts

My Experiences With “Hyping”

To join ghosting, benching, and breadcrumbing, this week, a new dating term was added into our vocabulary- “hyping”. Essentially The One Before The One, the hyper acts as the warm-up act, before the hypee to then move on to the main performer.

Maybe you made out with a guy a couple of times but it never progressed to actual dating. He’d just come out of a serious relationship, he wasn’t really looking for anything, and it was disappointing, but y’know, that’s life. Next thing you know he’s got a girlfriend. Or maybe you were seeing someone, you wanted to DTR, but she didn’t. She wasn’t looking for anything serious, she wasn’t ready, and it was disappointing, but y’know, that’s life. Next thing you know she’s got a boyfriend. Or maybe you were in a relationship with someone, possibly for a weeks, a few months, or even a few years. But he didn’t believe in marriage, he wasn’t ready to settle down, either way it just wasn’t a “forever” thing, and it was disappointing, but y’know, that’s life. Next thing you know he’s engaged.

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Thoughts

No. Cut Him Off.

So you match with this guy on Tinder. His chat is pretty decent, so you meet up for a drink. Instant connection. You go home with butterflies in your stomach. You fall into a pattern of seeing each other once of twice a week. It’s all going well. It’s like you’re going out, but neither of you has brought up “what you are” yet. After 2 months, you raise the question. He says he’s not really sure yet, and needs more time to decide. So you give him time. After 3 months, you raise the question again. He says he’s still not sure. You start to feel a little irked. I mean, it’s been 3 months. You’re sure. So why isn’t he? You wonder whether you should just sit out. Maybe 3 months is too soon. Maybe after 4, he’ll realize how great you are and make it official. Or maybe you should just enjoy it for what it is. You enjoy his company, it’s better than nothing, so maybe you should just carry on and try and ignore the niggling sense of dissatisfaction at the back of your mind?

No. Cut him off.  

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Thoughts

Tyrese Gibson, And Judgement

So this video on Bet by actor Tyrese Gibson has been making the rounds recently.

For those of you who don’t have audio or can’t be bothered to watch the video, basically he offers some rather sketchy dating “advice” to women:

“I’m gonna tell you all right now, and this might be harsh — sluts, skeezers, hoes, tramps and overly aggressive promiscuous women, they are never without a man because they don’t have no standards. They ready to have sex with any and everything that want to have sex with them. But when you are single, and you actually love yourself, you know your value and your self worth, you hold out until God sends you what’s yours.”

He continued, “So sometimes they be talking mess to women that are single but I have a respect for them because if you’re single and you might say, ‘I’ve been single for a couple years,’ whatever the case may be, you actually holding out because you have your value. You have women that are active out in these streets, they going to lunches and dinners every night. Private planes, mega yachts, it’s cracking. They’re never without. However, it comes with a cost, you gonna put a lot of miles on yourself down there, come on.”

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Uncategorized

5 Things I Hate About Dating

Dating. When it works out, it’s the best feeling in the world. The journey there however, does not run as smooth. We put ourselves through a never-ending stream of Tinder flakes and bad first dates, in the hope of eventually meeting The One. We long for the day we get married, not because we’re even that keen on a big wedding, but because it means we get to DELETE ALL THE DATING APPS FROM OUR PHONES.

Although (hopefully) it’ll all be worth it in the end, in order to vent my frustration and hopefully offer some entertainment along the way, I’ve put together a list of the top 5 things I hate about dating.

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